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http://www.bestweekever.tv/2008/07/24/sytycd-we-learned-a-new-dance-move-called-the-tongue-kiss/  I'm back! I'd like to offer my deepest apologies for no recap last week. As some have suggested, Virginia doesn't have TV, internet, or dancing, so really, it was quite impossible. Anyway, I'm here now, and isn't that all we have? The here and the now? [Cue Luther Vandross song. Right now, I am doing a Mia-Michaels-esque tribute dance to you inside my cubicle, both in apology and also as a promise of a bright future of SYTYCD recaps. The interns are scared.]
SO! Last night's show was fantastic. Most of the dances were home runs and everybody was having a lot of fun. I think the judges are enjoying themselves more now because they don't have to personally kick anyone off the show. That's OUR responsibility. Each newly paired couple danced twice, and each individual dancer performed a solo routine.
BEST MOVIE PITCH: When Nigel commented that the male dancers this year look like they're from the movie 300, he suddenly had an idea for the perfect movie: a 300 sequel wherein the warriors must participate in a dance off. It's box office GOLD!
 BEST GUEST JUDGE IN SYTYCD HISTORY: Toni "Hey Mickey You're So Fine" Basil!!! She's 64 now, and she's obviously had quite a bit of work done, so at first I didn't realize that's who she was. Did you know she also choreographed David Byrne's dance moves in "Once In A Lifetime?" Nowadays, Toni is the choreographer for Bette Midler's show in Vegas. She had good comments for the dancers, though her constant talk about being "street" was pretty amusing, even if she was one of the first pop-lockers in the world.
BEST ARGUMENT THAT SOMETIMES, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE CAN BE FUN! The judges raved over Katee and Twitch's violent love-hate dance. Nigel even said that he's been in that situation many times, and Mary just loved the part where Katee was strangling Twitch.
THE NEW GESTURE THAT ALL THE KIDS ARE DOING THAT MY OLD WHITE ASS CAN'T UNDERSTAND: Last week and this week I noticed contestants putting their hands up on their shoulders. Does anyone know what this means? Is it something they do to imitate Comfort, who seems to do that all the time? Does it have to do with the number 4, that whole IV Real thing, i.e. Season 4 is FOR REAL you guys?
Read about the performances, after the jump!
 ROUND 1
WILL & COURTNEY
These two danced the Samba for their first dance. The choreographer, Jean Mark Generaux, taught the pair that doing this dance is basically like getting kicked in the groin and punched in jaw, over and over again. FUN! Courtney is wearing a couple of strings glued to her body, and Will is wearing a classy mesh top. Nigel says this dance has made him feel like it's going to be a great night. His only criticism was that there was too much thinking about technique at some points. Mary loved it and awarded them a couple of screams, and Toni said she had so much fun she actually forgot she was judging them.
COMFORT SOLO
Each of the contestants tonight talked about how they were inspired to become a dancer. Comfort explains that she is basically self-taught, and as a teenager her dad sent her to a performing arts school that didn't have any hip-hop classes. But she's grateful because it provided her with some training in other areas of dance. Comfort is really growing on me more and more, and I'm glad she's back in the game. Her solo was standard Comfort fare, however, and I'd love to see something different or spiced up in some way.
 TWITCH & KATEE
First they are doing a contemporary routine by Mia Michaels. Fun fact: they reveal in the pre-taped segment that they knew each other before getting on the show. Anyway, the dance involves a couple that has a love-hate relationship. This was a super cool dance using a doorway, and began with some full-on tongue-kissing. WOWZA! Katee's hair was sort of Amy Winehouse-esque, and really, it kind of made me think that Mia Michaels choreographed this dance based on Amy's relationship with Blake. Nigel thought the performance was just fantastic, and noted that he's "been in that situation," implying that many women, including Mary, are always knocking on his door. Mary screamed at that. Then, Mary made an attempt at some standup: "Knock knock?" Nigel: "Who's there?" Mary: "Two." Nigel: "Two who?" Mary: "TWO OF THE BEST DANCERS WE'VE EVER SEEN ON THIS SHOW!!" Toni noted that Twitch lucked out with this "funk" music, and loved it.
 WILL SOLO
Will reveals that the moment he wanted to become a dancer was when he saw Dirty Dancing for the first time, when Patrick Swayze jumped off the stage and went down the aisle. I'm not sure you can get more American than that. I love seeing Will on his own now, his personality, and versatility is really starting to come through. Case in point: his solo dance is basically a James Brown impersonation! Hilarious and fun.
 COMFORT & MARK
These two do a school-themed hip-hop routine choreographed by Tabitha & Napoleon. When I heard the song begin with a school bell ringing, I prayed they would be dancing to the Saved By The Bell theme song. Alas, it was not, but it was still a great dance. I love Mark's "stank" face. At the end of their dance, Mark held up a piece of paper where he had written "I will not be in the bottom three..." repeatedly. Nice touch. Nigel commented that he was surprised that Comfort dances so much better when she's choreographed as opposed to when she's doing her solo. But even more surprising was how good Mark was. Mary thought they nailed it and really lifted Comfort up. Toni said she knows how difficult the choreography can be because she occasionally takes classes from Tabitha & Napoleon. ( Did I mention how much I love this woman?) She thought they were great and that they really had the ear for the "groove." I love Toni's old school adjectives for hip-hop.
KATEE SOLO
Katee's back-story is fairly boring (put in dance classes from an early age). Though the pictures of her as a kid were super cute. Her solo dance is to the song "Taking Chances" by Celine Dion, and consisted of fairly standard Katee twirly stuff.
 CHELSEA & JOSHUA
Their first dance is the Argentine Tango, and in the pre-taped segment Joshua makes a punny joke when he says "I wanna tango, but not tanGO home!" HEYO! The dance was excellent, I thought, and it very sexily used a table and chair. Nigel said that Chelsea's legs are absolutely fantastic, but not in that way - but in how she used them. He then said that Joshua has the biggest butt in the competition. Mary said this Argentine Tango was perfect for these two, and their chemistry was great. They're both still on the hot tamale train. Toni whipped out some more great vocab when she said their dancing felt "spontaneous and torrid."
MARK SOLO
Mark was inspired to dance when Phantom Of The Opera came to Hawaii. He dances to the uber-hip Santogold, and once again brings his interesting dance style to the table!
 ROUND 2
WILL & COURTNEY
This time around, Will and Courtney are doing a Tabitha/Napoleon slow hip-hop dance. The story is about wanting just one more moment to spend with someone who has passed on (i.e., Will is a ghost). They dance to Alicia Keyes and it's nice. Nigel once again mentions that this is the first season that hip-hop has been able to melt his stone heart and affect him emotionally. He compared their dance to the movie Ghost, and said he almost felt like he wanted to be a voyeur and watch this dance done privately between the two of them. Can you imagine doing a dance with your loved one and then finding out that Nigel is watching you from inside your coat closet? Mary said that tonight these two did not meet her expectations....THEY BLEW HER EXPECTATIONS RIGHT OUT OF THE WATER!!! You got us again, Mary Murphy! Then she said "Cart me away and take me to the funny farm if I didn't like that!!!" Mary, I'm sorry, but if you're going to be carted away to the funny farm, it won't be for that reason. Ahem. Toni bragged that she was one of the original Lockers, and was so happy to see hip-hop becoming a great American art form.
CHELSEA SOLO
Chelsea talked about her background in ballroom dancing, and said that competing in those competitions really helped build her confidence. Her solo is to one of my FAVE SONGS, Damaged by Danity Kane! Do do do you have a first aid kit handy? She also revealed that it's her birthday, and she's only 19!!! [Cough. Spit out my water. Sob.]
 TWITCH & KATEE
Twitch and Katee are now dancing a Broadway routine, which is bawdy and a lot of fun. Nigel loved it, and said that Twich is such a wonderful character, and even though he's probably the least trained dancer on the show, he's risen to every single challenge they've given him. For Katee, Nigel says the best compliment she can pay her is by saying that there hasn't been one routine he hasn't enjoyed. Mary said "I can't fake you guys out, that was terrific" and that it looks like they just came right off Broadway. Toni disagreed somewhat, saying that Twitch is more real than Broadway dancers, who can be fake. Twitch however, is street! Toni also noted that Katee's approach to the dancing wasn't quite deep or rough enough to match the voice of the song. In other words, try to be more of an elderly whore, okay?
 JOSHUA SOLO
Joshua was inspired by a teacher at school to dance, and the rest is history! His solo is pretty good, and I am continually amazed that he is a hip-hop dancer first - he is so great at the other styles.
COURTNEY SOLO
Courtney's upbringing in dance follows your typical suburban girl who goes to dance classes. Her solo is anything but typical though. I really think her solo dances have so much emotion. Is it her hair? Why I am so obsessed with her hair?
TWITCH SOLO
Twitch didn't get serious about dancing until his senior year of high school. He spent several months in South Korea doing some music videos and stuff. He's wearing a sort of "Super Twitch" emblem on his t-shirt. His dance is great fun! I like how he always does a movement to match the computery "dance dance dance" at the end of his solos.
 COMFORT & MARK
For their final dance, Comfort and Mark danced a jazzy Fox Trot routine. It was a bit rough. Nigel said that "lady luck walked in the room when you got your hip-hop routine, and she walked out when you got your fox trot." There was no chemistry and they were thinking too hard; it felt slightly amateurish. Youch. Mary agreed and said that they had the worst close hold she'd ever seen. Toni felt the power and technique was not behind their movement...buuuut, their HIP-HOP ROUTINE WAS FAAAAABULOUS!
 CHELSEA & JOSHUA
These two close the show with a disco dance by none other than Cher's choreographer, Doriana Sanchez. During the pre-taped segment they say they are going to attempt a lift that has NEVER been done before on the show - you mean, something like the dangerous special move from Cutting Edge? YES! The dance is incredible and nearly gives Josh a heart attack, what with the 40 or so lifts. Nigel raved about it, and pointed out that even though Joshua had to have all the strength to make those lifts happen, Chelsea had to have the courage to do it. Mary couldn't believe all the lifts Doriana put in and complimented Chelsea on the grace with which she exited the lifts. Toni joked about how these kids weren't even born when she was dancing disco, but they were able to truly embody the spirit of the dance.
PREDICTION: As sad as I am to say this, I think Mark and Comfort may be going home this week. But who knows who America will like best. Was Will too goofy with his James Brown routine? Are Joshua and Twitch too much alike (in that they are hip-hop dancers...I actually think they are very different, but will America care)? |
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Sometimes, on a slow news day, Sienna Miller's pubic hair is a breaking story. As is the case today, when this little nugget of newsdom rolled across my digital desktop, which I've left nearly intact as all of it is priceless: 
Several months ago when I first signed up for DirecTV, I 
50 Cent is 
I know you're into helping the Earth and people and sh*t, Brad, so here's your chance. Just change your name to "Best Week Ever" (and slip the URL Bestweekever.tv into your next movie if you get a chance) and I will donate a stone-cold five hundred big ones, CASH, to any charity you want. Disease research, hurricane relief, you name it. Hell, I'll even throw it to NAMBLA if you want -- you just change your name and it's up to you.
On last night's Project Runway, the designers had to design a dress out of eco-friendly materials. There were two catches: their clients were their models, and the models had to do the shopping, without the designer present. Three of the models chose this nasty-looking brown satin, and on top of that, not nearly enough of it to make anything really great. Leanne's design was one the judge's least favorite. When they asked the model, Karalyn, what she thought of the dress, she said it wasn't what she had in mind. Then guest celebrity judge Natalie Portman commented that Karalyn kind of looked like Peter Pan. In response to that, Karalyn made one of the brattiest stink faces I've ever seen, as if she was just dying to chime in with "It TOTALLY does and I f*cking hate this stupid b*tch that designed it, and can we be BFF's, Natalie Portman???" POOR LEANNE! Her model not only chose some butt-ass scrap of fabric for her to work with, but then when they're in front of the judges, she throws her under the bus. Kind of a dumb move on Karalyn's part. She obviously forgot that whole designer-
annoyed
accomplished